Why wait until Tet to show filial piety?
But why must filial piety to parents, gratitude to ancestors, and concern for relatives be shown on Tet? Or more broadly, why must the love we have for each other be shown on one day or another, instead of being expressed every day? And what we consider happiness, do others feel the same way?
I agree that Tet is a time for family reunion, for gathering if someone has to be away from family, away from hometown to study, earn a living. All year round, there is no chance to see parents, siblings, relatives, then during Tet, returning to hometown is the right thing to do.
Family reunion to celebrate Tet
However, if someone lives with their parents, or lives nearby, and comes back every few weeks, and relatives rarely attend birthday parties, first birthday parties, housewarming parties, or full-month parties, then there is nothing wrong with closing the door and traveling alone or with the whole family during Tet. After a year of hard work, taking care of parents regularly, and on New Year's Eve, taking care of the ancestors, on the first and second day of the New Year, if you pack your backpack and go traveling, no one will dare to blame you for being ungrateful or not caring about your family. Caring for each other must be shown every day, not just waiting until Tet to visit and give gifts, except in cases of force majeure.
Instead of waiting until Tet to bring your children back to their hometown, why not let the children come back to visit their grandparents for a month during the summer so they can meet and play with their cousins and uncles, so that their grandparents can satisfy their longing? Instead of not going back to visit their parents all year long and saving it for Tet, why not take advantage of your free time to come back and visit?
Instead of spending only 2 days a year, March 8 and October 20, to give flowers and gifts to your wife, why don't husbands spend 365 days a year sharing housework with their wives, going to the market to cook when their wives are busy, and bringing a bowl of porridge to their wives' rooms when they are sick?
Tet is not far away
Tet is not far away but right in our hearts. If we feel happy and peaceful with our loved ones and they feel the same, then that is true happiness. When you feel happy because you get to eat your mother's cooking during Tet, see your mother, sisters, and younger sisters working hard all day in the kitchen making coconut jam, pumpkin jam, are they sure that they are as happy as you? When you get to sit down and drink with your father, with your relatives, are the women in your family tired because they have to compete in the kitchen after more than 360 days of struggling with pots and pans? If they are also happy because you get to eat delicious food, feel the Tet atmosphere, then it's okay, but if they feel tired, you have to reconsider.
Family together spring outing and taking photos during Tet
Happiness is simple but often not easy to have a common denominator for everyone. If what makes us happy but makes our loved ones tired, then that is certainly not happiness.
We need to educate our children to understand that Tet should be a time to enjoy happy days with their loved ones, no matter where they are. Don’t force everyone to return to their hometown during Tet, stay home to pay respects to their ancestors on all days, and judge them as heartless if they go out for three days of Tet. We have 365 days to love, not just three days of Tet!
And you, this Tet, will you choose to return home to celebrate Tet with your family or travel far away to enjoy the holidays?
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