Instead of being long-winded and showing off their intelligence with macro topics, candidates who honestly express themselves, tell a special story and have an impressive opening... will easily win over the admissions board.
Sandra Bazzarelli, an essay coach and graduate of Columbia University and New York University, shared four highly regarded essay writing tips in a video on February 2.
Focus on yourself
Whatever story or topic you choose to tell in your essay, Sandra says it’s important that you focus on yourself. Your essay is where you show the admissions committee who you are and what your personality is like.
"You are the star of the essay, so make yourself clear through your personal aspects, through your personal voice. Don't try to be anyone else because the admissions committee is looking for the special things that you have," she said. Therefore, writers should not hesitate to show their humor, sensitivity and unique points in personality and perspective.
Candidates should not act smart or talk about big topics with high-level vocabulary in order to impress because this will only make you sound mechanical, stereotyped and disconnected from the admissions committee.
Essay writing expert Sandra Bazzarelli shares how to prepare an impressive essay to apply to top US universities. Screenshot
Experts say that using overly formal language in an essay can sometimes take away the necessary emotion from the reader. According to Sandra, you can use difficult vocabulary learned in test prep like the SAT (standardized test often used for admission to American universities), but you should not overuse it. Think of vocabulary as spices used in a dish, with the purpose of enhancing the taste of the person enjoying that dish. Using words that are too sophisticated without really grasping the true meaning It's like putting too much seasoning in your food.
Tell a special story and connect with yourself
The essay is an opportunity for the candidate to share their story, but should focus on a particular moment or aspect, rather than a lengthy retelling.
"An essay is not a memoir, so avoid summarizing life stages because it will be difficult for the admissions committee to understand the message you want to convey," said Ms. Sandra.
Candidates should pay attention to the relationship between themselves and the aspect or topic they want to talk about. For example, how that experience has developed you, what value it has brought you, and your future wishes and plans based on the lessons learned from this experience.
Having read many essays, Ms. Sandra advises that when choosing a topic or story to tell in an essay, candidates need to Avoid fictional stories because the admissions committee will detect them and judge the applicant's sincerity.
Make an impression with the hook
The personal statement is not a piece of writing that follows a set of rules. Grammar is important, but with the essay, admissions officers will appreciate the creativity of the candidate to express themselves, beyond the information on the application.
The opening of your essay is called the hook. It is a way to present your story in a way that piques interest and makes the admissions committee more curious about your message and the topic you are addressing.
Ms. Sandra says that an opening sentence can begin with a question, a quote, a statement, a controversial statement, or an action, either directly or indirectly.
For example, the question asks you to talk about an important person or someone who has had a big influence on you. With a direct opening, you can repeat the question: "The important person in my life is...". The indirect way is to tell a story related to that person. Through the description and storytelling, the admissions committee can imagine what the candidate wants to talk about.
Sandra gave examples of opening sentences that made her wonder what's going on? or what's next?: "Nobody's listening," "Welcome to New York," "What am I?", "Most people go to church on Sundays to find God, I go to find sports"...
She remembers most the essay of a student who loved Chemistry, which began with the sentence: "I made a bomb". This sentence immediately made the reader surprised, wondering "a bomb?". This candidate told about the opportunity to work as a lifeguard at a swimming pool as an extracurricular activity. The student's job was to check the chlorine concentration every day to ensure the water in the pool was safe. One time, she accidentally created an explosion in the pool while testing the chemicals. Although she was not affected, this was a lesson learned and she wanted to help everyone learn from her mistake. This student was later accepted to Villanova University.
Sandra also liked another essay that began with the question, “Are there any limits to what you can do for the people you love?” The applicant wrote about her grandfather, describing how much he cared for her and how much he loved her. She also called him “my haraboji” instead of just calling him “granpa.”
One of Ms. Sandra's Vietnamese students also used the word "bà hà" in her essay instead of "grandma" to avoid repetition. Incorporating Vietnamese culture and language into your essay helped you get accepted to Boston University, Class of 2023.
"Don't just say grandma, grandpa, you can replace it with a way of calling in your culture or language, the way you call the person you love," Sandra added.
Don't be afraid to write and rewrite.
Essay writing is an iterative process, from drafting, reading, reading aloud, sharing with others, editing, rereading, rewriting... Sandra compares reading aloud to listening to a song. Reading the lyrics gives you a different experience than when you listen to the song. Reading aloud is important, helping you feel an experience that you have never felt when reading in your head.
Essay experts say many students who get into top universities have to rewrite their essays many times, even changing topics constantly, just to find the right direction.
Dawn
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