Blue sky

Illustration: Phan Nhan

“They’re back together, my dear.” The news from Hien’s mother on the phone made Thanh happy, and his efforts to mend things were worth it. Thuong was angry with her husband and went back to her parents’ house. The day Thanh asked Thuong out to talk, she said angrily: “I came because I respect you…”. Thanh was a little shocked, but he still tried to smile. His friend’s story made his heart pound. He himself couldn’t imagine where he had found the words to speak so convincingly. He was always enthusiastic with Thuong and Hien, especially when Thuong’s mother was sick, and then two years later she passed away.

Young people think differently, they love passionately, miss each other intensely, and when they have each other, they quickly push each other away. And sometimes, the hardships of life make them run away. Over the years, the matter of making money and having children kept blowing harsh winds into their home, making Hien miserable, his forehead always filled with thoughts. Hien's mother considered Thanh as her own son, sometimes looking at the two of them, she sadly said: "Please encourage them for me. Your life is so peaceful, but they are..."

Thanh couldn't remember how many times Hien invited him to a familiar coffee shop, sitting in a secluded corner with few customers, with a pot of green Japanese bamboo to whisper and confide, then chat about everything under the sun. There were also many times when the two of them sat at a beer shop to relieve their boredom, looking at many people with dizzy faces, not knowing if they were really happy or laughing, but deep down inside, they were restless and stormy. Every time they drank, the clinking of glasses made Hien less thoughtful, less concerned about why his life was so full of hardships. In real life, some people got pregnant after bumping into each other, but some people waited and waited... For more than ten years, Hien and his wife had "forgive" each other everywhere to get treatment, to find a child but still could not satisfy their desire. Looking back and forth after all those years of working, the two of them only had an apartment of more than forty square meters. Going to work during the day, coming home at night, the two of them stared at each other, sometimes just listening to each other's breathing made them feel uncomfortable. On Saturdays and Sundays, when he didn't go home, Hien would go out drinking with friends, while Thuong would gather with friends to chat. The feelings between husband and wife gradually faded away, and to the point where they didn't want to talk. Many nights, each of them would lie in a different place, surf the internet until they were bored, and then fall asleep. If they didn't want to talk, they wouldn't be interested in going home. At night, Hien would hang out with friends, sometimes getting drunk.

The news reached Hien's parents. Hien's mother sighed, telling them to persevere with their children. Hien just obeyed to reassure his parents. Deep down, he didn't want to try. The mother met her daughter-in-law and encouraged her: "Don't be discouraged, my child..." Sadness filled Thuong's eyes and eroded her youthfulness. She avoided meeting them to avoid hearing too many urgings. Sometimes she even wanted to avoid Hien, which increased the rift between the two. Hien's mother called Thanh to ask him to roll up his sleeves and try to make things work, to keep the two from falling apart. It was true that each person had their own situation. Thanh himself often sighed because of the ironic situations that life poured into each small family. Hien's story was the same as that of thousands of people out there. Hien's couple was sad and unstable. It wasn't until Hien's siblings joined in, offering to lend him money to send his wife abroad for in vitro fertilization, that Hien's face relaxed. Before Hien took his wife abroad, Thanh came to visit. Hien's wife was elated as if the matter had almost succeeded. For women, when at the depths of despair, every ray of sunshine sometimes evokes a strong hope.

***

Since when, friends always come to Thanh to confide in him, they reveal all their hidden frustrations, conflicts, and brokenness. Thanh feels that he has the ability to mend his friends. Before the Hien-Thuong couple, the couples Uyen-Hai, May-Manh, or Dung-Luong were all on the brink of breaking up. Then, Thanh's younger siblings who often quarreled over trivial matters, he also rolled up his sleeves to straighten out the mess and put them back in order.

But no one knows about Thanh. Life goes by so fast that it seems to have no end and makes new things become old very quickly. Thanh and his wife cannot escape the conflict because their feelings fade and they cannot find a common voice. When the sex life cools down, the husband does not listen to his wife, the wife does not obey her husband, one is always angry with the other. He sees himself as a person who "cannot cut the handle of a sharp knife". His friends still see him going to work normally, smiling all the time and surely living a happy life. On the contrary, he is good at hiding his emotions and the suffering is pinned deep in his heart. Only during drinking parties, a little absent-mindedness and worry will appear in the corner of his eyes, and only those who are discerning will notice.

Thanh has a wife and two children. Thanh's wife works for a travel agency and has an extroverted lifestyle. She loves to travel, while Thanh just likes to stay in one place. Whenever someone praises him for being a meticulous and family-oriented husband, she secretly pouts. She means he doesn't pamper his wife and children, can't satisfy her interests, and stubbornly keeps his own ego. She often meets wealthy partners and successful men, so in her mind, she always compares her husband and thinks he's not as good as others.

At night, Thanh often locked himself in his room, which he called “the failure room”. The room had some old photos of Thanh when he was in high school, half of the people in the photos were poor or average students, but now they were rich and had a lot of money. In the photo of five close friends from college printed in a larger frame hanging near the bookshelf, Thanh was also the one who earned the least money. On the bookshelf were some unfinished manuscripts, which he did not want to write anymore because reading them again was boring. Thinking too much, he felt that he was really incompetent. Sometimes listening to instrumental music, thinking that it could distract him, unexpectedly he was lost in endless, vague thoughts. His wife was right to blame him. Despite being known as a good student, having a master’s degree, and working as a deputy manager, he still rode a rickety motorbike to work, while his friends had long since taken cars. Out there, cruel and lame comparisons made people confused and bewildered. Success is measured by the ability to make money, the luxurious lifestyle through each trip and dining at luxury restaurants. If I am not a waste, then what am I? Thanh thought.

***

The trip of Hien and Thuong was more successful than expected. After many months of conquering, searching and hoping, they had a baby boy. Hien and Thuong invited him and his wife over for dinner. Thanh's wife did not come, he came alone to congratulate his friend, then felt sad for himself. His pride and family seemed to be falling apart when Thanh found out his wife was texting and chatting with other men, including one who was far more than just a friend or colleague. Were they playing a game of cat and mouse? He intended to make a big fuss to let everyone know to ease his pain. But his pride and work forced him to keep quiet. He called his wife into the room and asked: "How long has that been going on? Have you given yourself to someone yet?" But his wife's face was full of challenge: "What does that trivial matter, texting have to do with you? Don't I have the right to live in my own world?" Thanh was annoyed and shouted: "Damn it, but you're cheating on me!" His fists were thrown into the air. His wife was also mumbling something that Thanh could not hear clearly. The little child cried loudly when Thanh broke the thermos.

Is this what peace and happiness are? His blood boiled, but he couldn't hit his wife. It would be cowardly to hit his wife. Things might go too far and there would be no way to save them.

Now, he just hopes someone can help him put the pieces back together.

He went out, called Hien and a few others to come drink. Long live the drinking place. Only places like this can help people like Thanh ease their gloomy mood. Thanh raised his glass and felt his hand heavy. Looking at his friend's face, Hien understood that Thanh was worried. That night, when Thanh was settled in the "failure room", still dizzy from alcohol, Hien texted: "Do you have marital problems? I guess that's the only thing that makes you sad". Thanh intended not to say it, but then, he admitted it and sighed: "Yes, his wife cheated on him and looked down on me, because I'm not as rich as other people"...

Thanh suddenly remembered what his teacher said, which was that every man needs a job to do, a woman to love, and an illness to die from. What will he do in his life's karma?

The next day, Hien asked Thanh to go to a coffee shop. The worldly affairs came flooding back in the warm aroma of coffee. Hien confided in and encouraged Thanh. Life is like that, no matter what, you still have to be calm and listen to your heart. Human life is never smooth, we adjust the mess to make everything more straight. Thanh was surprised at Hien's ability. For a long time, he thought he was the only one who knew how to comfort and encourage his friend, but who would have thought...

***

The city was hidden in the land of floating clouds. Outside, many young couples were smiling and becoming more beautiful in this magical land. The clouds drifted across the mountain tops, so charming. A couple was taking pictures of each other, occasionally the guy said something to the girl, making her giggle. He was startled by a voice calling from behind. It was his wife. Before he could ask what was going on, she sat down next to him, with a bright smile. She asked:

- Do you want to take a photo of your wife?

Thanh was still surprised, he suddenly exclaimed:

- Yes, beautiful wife, beautiful scenery like this, why not!

After getting some nice pictures, the wife pulled Thanh to sit at the table and ordered coffee. She said:

- Your friend, Hien, is really thoughtful. I asked him to show me the way to find you. Stop thinking about it, I did those messages on purpose… If I had hidden them, how would you have known?

Outside, the sky suddenly became clear. The green mountains and forests made the clouds drift. It turned out that his wife wanted Thanh to change, when he was too absorbed in his work... Yes, each person needs to renew themselves, in some way, so that husband and wife always feel they need each other.

Source: http://baolamdong.vn/van-hoa-nghe-thuat/202503/bau-troi-trong-biec-4246e80/