On Saturday night, my 19-year-old daughter whispered to her father: “Dad, give me some money to buy some new clothes.” Her older sister, who was scrolling through her phone nearby, immediately chimed in: “Me too.” My husband transferred one million to each of us. On Sunday afternoon, before returning to the rented room to go to school early in the week, the older daughter whispered: “Dad, I need to pay 2 million for next month’s rent.” Her younger sister also took the opportunity to ask for this amount, but for 3 months.

My husband scratched his head and complained, he didn't earn any money but spent it like a mountain. I had to add another sentence to make the kids' father quiet down: "Have you finished paying the nearly 70 million VND for the children's tuition fees at the beginning of the year?"

I have 3 children, the oldest is in his final year at a private university, the second daughter is in her second year at the University of Foreign Languages ​​(Hanoi National University), and the youngest is about to finish secondary school. Many people often compliment my family on having 3 obedient and studious children, making their parents proud. But in reality, since raising our children to go to university, my husband and I have been so busy with money that we sometimes have headaches and tinnitus.

Raising children to go to college these days is so expensive. Roughly, each child costs about 100 million a year, while the couple in the countryside have a poor business and can't save much money.

Just for tuition fees each year, I need to pay about 30 million VND for each child, rent each month is about 2 million VND (including electricity, water, internet), food is about 2 million VND. Not to mention gas, phone bills, clothes, cosmetics, or sometimes my children ask for money to dye their hair, straighten their hair, buy women's clothes...

In addition, when the children started the new school year, the eldest had to buy a motorbike for 28 million VND. When the second child came, he probably saw that his parents were exhausted and said he would take the bus. But last week, he asked to buy a motorbike to conveniently go to IELTS classes and find a part-time job.

Speaking of extra classes, I thought that when my child went to university, this expense would be reduced, but no. The older daughter spends tens of millions every few months, from extra English classes to presentation skills classes, then design classes or something, the younger daughter wants to take an IELTS course...

Not only that, last year, my eldest sister participated in school activities and worked part-time, saving 4 million, and then "borrowed" another 4 million from her mother to buy a tablet for her study and work. I don't expect to get this loan back with no set repayment date.

It is very difficult for parents to send a child to college. In addition to paying a large sum at the beginning of the school year, we have to provide at least 10 million VND each month for 2 children, not to mention that tuition and rent increase every year. My husband often complains when his eldest daughter has one more year to graduate: "My parents are street vendors, but I am studying business administration. I don't know where to apply or what I can do in the future."

My husband and I have a hardware store in the countryside, earning just over ten million dong a month. I bought a sewing machine and took on contract sewing when there were few customers. My husband also took the opportunity to repair household appliances to earn some extra money.

There were times when money was not available, so we had to borrow money from neighbors to contribute to our children, and then one thing was added to another, and we had to be frugal with our family expenses. For several years, my parents did not dare to buy anything new for the house or for themselves. There were times when we were tired and angry, and we scolded our children a few times when they asked for money, but we could not bear to let them lack anything compared to their friends.

Seeing the cost of raising my first two children and seeing my neighbors sending their children to work abroad, I decided to guide my youngest son to follow that path.

My neighbor's child was a poor student and could not pass the public high school entrance exam, so after finishing middle school, his parents sent him to a vocational school combined with a cultural supplement. After graduating, he studied a foreign language for another 6 months and completed the procedures to go to Japan to work. The total cost for them to send their child to Japan was more than 100 million VND.

Up to now, even though the Japanese Yen exchange rate is low, each month, after deducting living expenses, their children can save 12-15 million VND, or even more if they have the opportunity to work part-time. After that, when they return home, they will have some capital, can open a store and do business or apply for a job at garment or mechanical companies, etc. with a salary of around ten million VND/month.

When I thought about this plan, my youngest son jumped up and said: “My two sisters can go to college, why do I have to work?”. Honestly, I don’t want to leave my son and let him struggle in a foreign land. But in reality, my son’s average academic ability and his 4-5 years of college are both expensive and his future may not be as bright as we expect. Is there any other way for parents to have less trouble and for him to not have too much trouble entering life?

Reader Vu Thi Tuyet (Phuc Tho, Hanoi)

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