North-South family story

Was it difficult for a Northern girl to marry a Southern daughter-in-law in the early days after liberation? You - an author with the intention of writing a book about those special days, asked me - a child of a North-South love affair.

My father was from the South, and went to the North to regroup according to the Party's policy of sending the children of Southern cadres to the North to study, preparing for the future reunification. My father's journey began in November 1954, when he was only 17 years old, and took more than 20 years. After studying and working, from a teenager living far away from his family, my father became a scientific cadre, got married and started a family under the protection and care of his fellow countrymen from the North and his deep nostalgia for the South, where his relatives were still there when the war was still fierce.

In April 1975, news of victory poured in from the South. Not only my father, but also the children of the South in the North at that time were restless, day and night looking forward to their homeland. Then the news of total victory came back, a man who had been trained strongly after more than 20 years away from home like my father also had to shed tears. After a few months of liberation, in October 1975, my father brought my mother back to the South, starting the first bricks to build a big family like today. My siblings and I were born one after another, our family followed my father's work, sometimes in Can Tho, then moved to Soc Trang, then down to Ca Mau and finally settled in Bac Lieu. Because of the nature of his work, my father was away from home all the time, at home only my mother took care of the young children. It was really hard and difficult for a Northern woman to marry a daughter-in-law in the South in the days when peace had just been restored. Because after the separation, the lifestyle and thinking of the people of the two regions have changed. In my vague memory, I still remember some people in the neighborhood calling my mother by the name "Mrs. Nam Bac Ky", not with any malicious intent but simply to recognize an important feature for easy remembering and calling, that's all. Later, my mother often told me that when she first moved in, she went to the market and couldn't distinguish between the names of shrimp and prawns or how to prepare eel to cook sour soup with lemongrass and chili...

Illustration: VT

Time passed, just like the way the people of the North protected and sheltered my father during the 20 years he was away from his family, my mother was loved, helped, and shared love by her paternal family and neighbors to get through those difficult days. My father went to work far from home, while my mother worked, took care of the children, and raised pigs to improve her life. Fortunately, thanks to relatives and neighbors, my mother was able to overcome the hardships and difficulties. I still remember the time I heard that my grandmother had passed away, because the road was so far and the means of transportation were difficult, my mother cried because she could not return in time to see her off for the last time. The aunts and uncles in the neighborhood gathered around and comforted her a lot.

My brothers and I grew up playing with the kids in the neighborhood, speaking with a pure Southern accent, without distinguishing between Northerners and Southerners. After visiting my maternal hometown, when I returned home, I would imitate my cousins ​​there by braiding my hair on both sides, occasionally adding a few Northern dialect words in my speech. My mother gradually learned to speak with a standard Southern accent, knew how to eat some Southern specialties, and loved Cai Luong as much as she loved Cheo singing... A Northern-Southern family in a small Southern neighborhood, mixed and filled with love!

Also in that small village, there were many families from the North and the South like mine. Some people had families in the South, and after returning from the regrouping, they brought with them a wife and a bunch of small children. It is difficult to tell right from wrong in human relationships, especially on a long journey with no return date like that. Of the two women, one had to hold back her tears, quietly stepping back to give happiness to the other. Regardless of who had to step back, who could continue - that pain was still a silent wound from the division of the country during the war that not everyone in peacetime could fully understand.

Tam Ngoc

Source: https://www.baobaclieu.vn/van-hoa-nghe-thuat/chuyen-gia-dinh-nam-bac-100174.html