In order to be able to take care of their children as they wish, many young mothers choose to separate their children from their grandparents early - Illustration: TRIEU VAN
Suffering with old and new parenting methods
Mothers always think of themselves as "experts" in taking care of children. That's partly true, because after all, they have experienced all the hardships of a mother's life. Most recently, by taking care of their children, they have raised a child to become a good person, now a husband and a father.
As for young mothers, first-time mothers today always cling to the idea that they love their children very much and are doing everything for them. They choose to raise their children using many different methods from books, the Internet... instead of following traditional methods.
No one is wrong. It's just that somehow, the way women raise their children is not very suitable for young mothers.
T. - a young father - texted to ask if my wife was forbidden from drinking water, bathing, or washing her hair when she first gave birth. He complained about being unjustly put in the role of "judge" between his wife and the mothers.
His wife had just given birth and was "traumatized" because her mother did not allow her to bathe or wash her hair for the first month. He was afraid that before the pain of giving birth, he would get sick from being dirty.
Many young couples today when having children will encounter the above situation. Just starting out is already very difficult. The difficulty here is that everyone is right, everyone has their own reasons.
Women do it for the good of their children. But for young mothers, it seems impossible.
If they don't separate them, I'm afraid this "war" will never end. Or if it does, it will be a sad ending, full of sighs.
The terror of losing sleep while taking care of children - Illustration: TRIEU VAN
Nights of tears
Giang Ngoc (27 years old, living in Binh Tan district, Ho Chi Minh City) said that to avoid a tense "war" from the very beginning, she and her husband "fought" for the right to raise their child even before the child was born. The maternal and paternal grandparents agreed immediately. Of course, with this method, the couple almost had to be completely self-reliant in taking care of the child.
Many times, Ngoc complained that taking care of a small child is very hard!
"I had to quit my job because I was worried if I didn't take care of my child directly. My grandparents couldn't stay with me for long, and even if they did, it would be difficult," Ngoc confided.
Ngoc said what she feared most was her baby crying at night. The scene of not being able to sleep peacefully at night for nearly the first 3 months in a row, sleeping fitfully and then being awakened by the sound of her baby crying through the night, along with the feeling of confusion, not knowing what was wrong with her baby and being afraid. It was truly terrifying.
Ngoc followed a method of raising young children that was spread online from the beginning. When the child started eating solid foods, he had to sit properly in a chair, focus on eating, and the parents did not force him to eat. On the contrary, the opinion of his maternal and paternal grandmothers was to try to "entice" the child in many ways, from toys, taking him for a walk, shouting...
The hardship of taking care of a baby also comes from having to constantly keep an eye on them, especially when they are learning to roll over, crawl, stand, or walk. Almost the entire day revolves around the baby, even when the baby is sleeping. In return, every time the baby learns something is also very fun.
Ngoc said, if her child caught a cold and had a dry cough, she would feel terrible pressure. She was so happy when her child drank 160ml of milk, but then she heard her child coughing. And then everything went back to normal, the milk just kept pouring out, making the mother's heart extremely heavy.
"The worst part is at night, when the baby is sleeping soundly, he suddenly starts coughing and makes a fuss. My husband and I have to get up, clean him, change his clothes and diapers, and we feel so sorry for him that tears are about to fall," Ngoc said.
Things like having to eat in a hurry, skipping meals, and sometimes having to go out with the child halfway through a bath are common for young couples who choose to take care of their children on their own.
What have you experienced in the process of raising children? Do you have any tips or experiences that you would like to share to encourage new parents who are just starting to raise young children? Please send your comments to email [email protected]. Tuoi Tre Online thanks you.
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