(Dan Tri) - It is quite common for parents today to often feel worried, afraid that they will fall behind other parents, and afraid that their children will be inferior to their friends.
Even in the Western world, where education is considered ideal and where parents are said to be more relaxed about their children's learning, in reality, parents in the United States often feel anxious.
According to a survey by the American Psychological Association (APA), nearly 50% of American parents participating in the survey said they were regularly psychologically stressed because of raising children.
Raising children in today's era, parents easily feel pressured and exhausted (Illustration: Vecteezy).
In fact, parents today spend more time with their children and care more about them, but many still feel worried, thinking that they have not yet given their children the best they can, making their children not "equal to their peers".
American psychologist Jenny Woo believes that parents who know how to solve their own psychological problems are those who know how to encourage themselves: "I have tried, made enough effort, and done everything well enough."
“Good enough” is a way for parents to remind themselves of what is most important to themselves and their children, instead of chasing unrealistic goals set by others.
Raising children in today's era, parents can easily feel pressured and exhausted. Below are 2 measures to help parents reduce stress.
Set your own standards and goals for yourself and your children.
Dr Jenny Woo said many parents feel worried because their children often follow trends on social networks, like to compete with friends when new fashions appear. However, parents themselves rarely talk to their children about the pressures of parents, when parents also have to live in comparison with relatives, friends, and colleagues.
No matter what age we are, we all suffer from the pressure of comparison and evaluation. We all want to be the one who "has it all", who is not inferior to anyone, including raising good children.
Parents who know how to solve their own psychological problems are those who know how to motivate themselves (Illustration: Vecteezy).
Meanwhile, each family has its own story, each child develops in a different way. The race and constant comparison of oneself with other parents, comparing one's child with other people, will make parents feel tired, insecure, forgetting what is really important and meaningful to themselves and their children.
Instead of following other people’s standards, each parent should set their own standards in the process of raising children, understanding that everyone has limits. Children need to sympathize with their parents and vice versa, parents also need to understand their children’s limits.
Make a list of things not to do for your child.
If you do all the housework, the other members will not have the opportunity to contribute their efforts and show responsibility. Parents who raise their children well will know how to not do some work, let their children do it for themselves and help with the housework for the family.
Parents should set specific limits. At each age, children will have to learn to do some new tasks that are appropriate to their abilities. Parents creating a list of things not to do so that children are responsible for doing themselves will help parents reduce stress and pressure, simply because parents will reduce the number of tasks for their children.
For example, at what age should your child know how to set an alarm to wake up for school, at what age should he know how to wash dishes, do laundry, fold clothes, clean the toilet... At a certain age, your child should even know how to take responsibility for his own studies and parents should no longer check on his studies every day. The more you know how to trust your child, the more responsible he will be towards himself and his family.
Parents should create a list of tasks that they will no longer do for their children, including 3 to 5 tasks. Every 6 months, parents should review this list and add new tasks to it, as children continue to grow and become more capable of doing things on their own.
This method will help parents prepare their children for independence, self-reliance, and life skills.
Source: https://dantri.com.vn/giao-duc/phu-huynh-can-lam-gi-de-tranh-tam-ly-con-minh-khong-bang-con-thien-ha-20241207003704718.htm
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