Parents of children with high emotional intelligence avoid using these phrases when raising their children.
1. "Don't bother me, I'm busy!"
If parents often say this to their children, they will feel that their parents refuse to care about them and always want to push them away.
Gradually, children will lose the desire to talk, confide, and share with their parents.
If parents often tell their children: "Don't bother mom/dad", the children will feel that their parents refuse to care about them. Illustration photo
2. "Calm down!"
It's never a good idea to tell children how they should feel, even if you're just trying to calm them down or cheer them up.
Psychotherapist Amy Morin (editor-in-chief of Verywell Mind) says it's important to pay attention to what your child does with the emotions that are occurring.
She suggests parents help their children understand that feeling upset or angry is normal and guide them to take a calming action, such as taking deep breaths or going for a run instead of screaming.
3. "You're so old but still make mistakes all the time"
At a child's age, the ability to perceive and solve problems is limited. And each child is a separate individual with different personality and psychological development.
Parents should not use adult standards to compare and position children.
4. "Don't worry about it"
When someone says "Don't worry about it," the worry doesn't automatically go away.
Instead, parents should have a better strategy, asking the question "What can you do when you are worried?" to their children.
This can help children think about problem solving and managing their thoughts in a healthier way.
When someone says, "Don't worry about it," the worry doesn't automatically go away. Illustration photo
5. "Children don't know anything, so why do you interrupt?"
Children also want to be part of the family, they just don't understand when to say it and when not to.
Parents can say to their children: "We know you want to share, so wait until we finish talking and then you can tell us."
6. "You will do well"
This is a positive outlook that can help children gain confidence, but no one can see through everything.
Parents really can't predict when their children will succeed or fail.
"In other words, giving kids assurances that they will succeed but not reach their goals can damage their self-esteem," says psychotherapist Amy Morin.
Instead of saying "You will win/do well!", parents should say "Try your best. If you fail, it's okay."
Giving children assurances that they will succeed but not achieve their goals can damage their self-confidence. Illustration
7. "Don't grow up to be like your parents!"
Some parents often joke with their children: "Don't be like your parents."
In the eyes of children, this statement is no different than the parent implicitly judging their partner, thinking that person is not good.
8. "Don't let me catch you doing that again."
This phrase is often uttered out of frustration and a desire to help a child avoid a bad or dangerous habit.
However, if you only warn children about the consequences of getting caught, they will only find ways to better hide their bad behavior.
On the contrary, if you teach your children to be honest with you about their mistakes, then you can help them learn and grow.
Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/8-cau-cha-me-cua-tre-eq-cao-khong-nen-noi-172250312111757868.htm
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