The reason why parents who spoil their children are less happy and even ungrateful

GĐXH - There is nothing wrong with parents loving their children, but if they love too much, it will cause children to fall into a deformed love.

The tragedy of parents who love their children too much

Many parents unconditionally satisfy all their children's demands without realizing it, they teach their children that: "If parents do not pamper them, it is their fault" . Below is an article by psychologist Xuan Vu (China).

One time, my friend bragged to me that her daughter "ate the whole fish" and her husband only tasted a little to test the flavor.

After saying that, my friend smiled and felt pleased that his daughter was a big eater. However, I felt a little uncomfortable.

This is not the first time I have heard parents talk about their children's greedy eating. When children have the right to choose, parents will diligently prepare the food, regardless of whether they can eat it or not.

If adults cook bad food, children have the right to eat it or not. Even when looking at leftover food on the table, there are mothers who say: "Sorry, next time I will make your favorite dish."

This is the great love of parents. But the child seems to take all of this for granted. Does loving a child mean sacrificing everything for the child, giving everything "without end"?

The most basic responsibility of parents is to teach their children how to behave properly. Illustration photo

A while ago I attended a colleague’s daughter’s birthday party. The mother got up early, decorated the party herself, and made a beautiful cake for her daughter.

When everything was ready, the main character of the party appeared but with a gloomy face. She reluctantly blew out the candles and cut the cake at the urging of her parents.

Throughout the party, the mother carefully peeled shrimp for her child, but after eating two pieces, the child was bored and then walked away.

The colleague sighed and said helplessly: "This child is difficult to serve. No matter what I do, I can't satisfy him."

Many parents like my colleague are trying to provide for their children but instead the child is unhappy.

What's more frightening is that children don't pay attention to their parents' "giving" and love. They become greedy, wanting whatever they want without trying.

They also complain a lot and face life with a "sour" attitude.

Love without parental discipline blurs the line between love and obedience.

Therefore, children will lose the ability to feel joy and happiness, not knowing how to care about others but only thinking about themselves.

There is nothing wrong with parents loving their children, but if they love too much, it will cause children to fall into a deformed love.

Raising children without gratitude and without loving their parents is the biggest failure of family education.

The more parents spoil their children, the less grateful they are.

On October 12, at Jinyintan subway station in Wuhan, Hubei province, a middle-aged woman carrying two heavy bags was kicked repeatedly by a 14-year-old girl walking behind her, her hands in her pockets.

This little girl kept saying, "Useless thing," which surprised many people. The scene looked like an arrogant rich mistress and her servant. But in reality, they were mother and daughter.

The mother came to the city for the first time so she got on the wrong subway station, the daughter got angry and hit her mother.

Seeing that scene, many people told the girl that if she continued, they would call the police. Hearing that, the mother quickly defended her: "It's okay, she's just a little stubborn, it's not a problem."

There are so many parents like that around us. When their children come home from school, their parents carry their schoolbags for them. They don't need to do any housework, they just need to study hard and get good grades.

Material comforts are over-indulged, even elementary school students are given cell phones.

And especially if children cause trouble outside, even if they are at fault first, they must be protected to the end.

These parents do everything for their children, even if they are asked to do something beyond their ability, they do not hesitate.

Children with such parents often forget that, instead of being grateful for their upbringing, they will take that sacrifice for granted.

Children whose parents do everything for them often forget that, instead of being grateful for their upbringing, they will take that sacrifice for granted. Illustration photo

In the book "Cruel Love" by author Sara, about educating children, there is a sentence: "The love that Chinese parents have for their children is too abundant. Not wanting their children to experience a difficult life from a young age, and not knowing how to meet their needs at the right time, in the end, parents suffer hardship all their lives, but the children still cry out in injustice."

Nowadays, many parents are unintentionally raising "ungrateful children". They have tried their best but still give birth to ungrateful children who only know how to receive and enjoy.

Such children feel that everything their parents do is for granted. If one day their parents do not satisfy them, the child will feel that it is the parents' fault and blame them.

A child who lives without gratitude is useless no matter how good he is.

Gratitude is a positive attitude towards life and is also a prerequisite for human success.

Unlimited love is actually harmful

Parents are the ones who guide their children. When their children make mistakes, parents must promptly correct them.

Tall trees never grow haphazardly and need timely pruning of crooked branches.

The same goes for educating children. They need to be corrected when they deviate so that when they grow up they can become useful people for themselves and society.

If parents blindly satisfy their children, their wants and needs will continuously expand. Illustration photo

A few days ago, the story "7-year-old girl stole a toy and her mother called the police" appeared on Weibo, causing heated discussions among netizens.

This little girl took toy eggs from the supermarket and was caught red-handed by the staff. Through the camera, the supermarket also discovered that this was not the first time the girl had done this. But no matter what the mother and staff asked, the little girl remained silent, determined not to say a word.

With no other choice, the mother called the police in the hope of helping educate her daughter. After more than an hour of persuasion, the 7-year-old girl admitted that she took the toy eggs because she did not have money to buy them.

"I'm sorry, I was wrong.." The little girl finally realized her mistake. She mustered up the courage to apologize to the staff and her mother, and promised never to do such things again.

The mother later fully compensated the toy store. But her actions were criticized by some people: "The little thing is molehill. The mother has hurt the child's self-esteem and will cause a stain on the child's soul."

But if the mother only compensates and prevents the child from admitting her mistake, is she condemned?

"Parents always allow their children to make mistakes because this is part of the growing up process. But while we allow it, we must guide them to be responsible and rational with every action they take," the police officer persuaded the 7-year-old girl.

According to this police officer, educating children does not have the concept of "making a mountain out of a molehill". Children's mistakes need to be corrected promptly before things get out of control.

"Life is not like a warm room. When children are exposed to poisonous wind, they need to be taught early how to protect themselves from harm," the police officer added.

Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/ly-do-cha-me-cang-chieu-chuong-con-cai-cang-kem-hanh-phuc-tham-chi-vo-on-172241111161709866.htm