The love philosophy of Mr. Tu the silversmith

Silversmith Mr. Tu (5th from right) on his grandchild's happy day - Photo: NVCC

Mr. Tu is 84 years old this year, suffering from a serious illness (lung-related), being treated at Hospital 30-4 (HCMC), having to use a ventilator and drain fluid, but his mind is still clear, telling old stories, discussing current events in a cheerful and interesting way.

The most important thing for a couple is to listen to each other.

Mr. Tran Van Tu is quite famous in Chau Thanh (Ben Tre) not only because of his 5-acre land for growing trees but also because of his optimistic spirit, his loyalty to his neighbors, and everyone loves him. In particular, everyone loves Mr. Tu the silversmith because of the way he lives with his wife and children.

"My wife passed away more than ten years ago. When she was alive, I always took care of everything inside and out," said Mr. Tran Van Tu. The daughter who took care of him said that when she was alive, he was always gentle and peaceful in all situations. Perhaps that was the secret to his happiness.

Recalling his youth, Mr. Tran Van Tu said that he started his career from nothing. From Tien Giang to Ben Tre, he met his wife, got married, and lived together for decades. The husband and wife relationship grew over the years, sometimes sad and happy, difficult due to the times or due to behavior, misunderstandings, but he never let things go too far.

"My wife is hot-tempered, talks a lot and rarely says sweet words. I am the opposite." For him, it is the law of compensation, although sometimes he really wishes she would say more sweet words.

Starting from scratch, Mr. Tu said that hard work and saving were the conditions for him to gradually change his life. "From working for hire, renting land to doing business to buying land and a house was a journey of effort, thrift, saving, and working together as a husband and wife," he said.

Of course, he admitted that he was lucky in starting his business, but his hard work over the years helped him build his fortune. Along with farming, Mr. Tu also worked as a silversmith. With skillful hands and a spirit of progress, he went from being a worker to being a business owner, becoming well-off, and being able to send his children to school thanks to his savings.

"I have a dream that my children can study, so I encourage anyone who can study," he said. He boasted: "Of my children and grandchildren, five are in the medical field. This is the profession I like the most because I think I can save people when they are sick and suffering."

Talking about the relationship between husband and wife, Mr. Tu said the most important thing is to listen to each other. One person speaks, the other listens. One person gets angry, the other endures. And it must be a two-way relationship, not one where one side endures while the other side keeps yelling, one side gets angry while the other side keeps coaxing. "A relationship like that will not be warm," he affirmed.

Children do not need me to do it for them.

At his rare old age and suffering from illness, Mr. Tu said he only remembers the happy things and good things of others, especially his wife, children and grandchildren. Whether someone is alive or dead is a fate we must encounter in life. Our happiness and sadness do not depend (and should not depend) on their attitude, but on how we accept it.

What he has done for his children and grandchildren, there are things that are not complete but there is nothing to regret. There are things that cannot be done, not because of his fault but because of many other reasons that make things not work out. For example, "I hope that all of them will study well, but some of them do not choose to pursue their studies, but choose to become silversmiths, open shops like me".

He happily accepted because it was his child's choice. Then he pointed to Ngan - his 8x granddaughter - "she studied pharmacy, she would have worked in a hospital or opened a pharmacy, but seeing her mother working so hard with the pharmacy, she followed her to help."

His philosophy in helping his children and grandchildren choose a career, a family, or a spouse is the same: "I only guide, not do it for them."

According to Mr. Tran Van Tu, each person has their own life to live with their own personality, dreams, aspirations, abilities, and abilities... "Even if we are a father or grandfather, we cannot force our children and grandchildren to follow us, or force them to do what we like. That is... nonsense," Mr. Tu asserted.

In a short conversation with Mr. Tu for a few hours at the hospital, we heard him share and felt like we had just learned a little bit of the life philosophy of a person who has gone through many ups and downs, sincerely contemplating his life and drawing out the things he has done, as an inheritance to leave to his children and grandchildren...

Source: https://tuoitre.vn/triet-ly-yeu-thuong-cua-ong-tu-tho-bac-20240623091652646.htm