GĐXH - After 13 years of living together, giving all the money he earned to his wife, when he was kicked out of the house, he had nothing in his hands.
Mr. Phon (62 years old) lives with his wife in Satuek district, Buriam province, Thailand. After 13 years of living together, everything was still peaceful and normal. Until recently, in mid-December 2024, his wife's stepson moved from Bangkok to live with them.
A few weeks later, he was thrown out of his home by his wife and stepchildren. On New Year's Eve, the poor man left home without a penny in his pocket.
Mr. Phon (62 years old) was emotional when telling his story. Photo: MSN
He wandered aimlessly from place to place, staying temporarily at police stations and begging for food from temples.
Luckily, a sugarcane farmer gave him a ride to Chai Wan district, Udon Thani province. He was then taken to hospital with severely swollen legs.
The doctor bandaged his wound and reported the incident to the police.
When recalling the time he lived with his wife, Mr. Phon could not hide his emotions. "More than 13 years meant nothing to her. Love was over," he choked.
After returning home, Mr. Phon wanted to become a monk, to find peace and leave behind his miserable life.
How to Build a Good Relationship with Your Spouse's Stepchildren
In the book You're a Stepparent… Now What?, author Joseph Cerquone offers practical ways to help parents build positive relationships with their stepchildren.
Avoid unrealistic expectations
Many parents feel pressured to make their new family the perfect one.
However, with the stresses of a previous marriage, finances, custody battles, and adjustments to new living circumstances, reality often presents a different scenario.
You should take small steps toward building a relationship with your stepchild.
Focus on building respect from them before you expect them to have a loving relationship with you.
Encourage openness
One thing parents can do is let family members know that it is okay to express their feelings and discuss their fears and insecurities.
But Cerquone warns not to expect kids to confide in you early. Initially, they'll mostly confide in their biological parents.
Please support
Realize the importance of the relationship between stepchildren and the "other" parent.
Don't try to replace them, but focus on creating a new relationship with your stepchild. And make sure you stay true to yourself.
You and your partner will need to communicate openly about your family on a regular basis. Be supportive of each other and make decisions together. Illustration photo
Cooperate with your spouse
You and your partner will need to communicate openly about your family on a regular basis. Support each other and make decisions together. Make sure the children know you are united in your decisions.
Build rules but no discipline
Before you can be a positive disciplinarian, you must earn something more than respect from your stepchild.
Until they understand you and trust you more, you cannot expect them to listen.
At first, parents should be actively involved in rule-making, but not involved in disciplining when rules are broken.
And remember to present house rules as a shared decision, so parents don't come across as the bad guys.
Don't let your stepchild be the reason.
Cerquone cautions that while stepchildren (especially those in their preteen or teen years) may be frustrating, don't blame them for all of the problems in your family or relationship with your spouse.
Ask yourself if their attitude and actions are the real problem, or if you are more frustrated with something else.
Maintain a sense of humor
A sense of humor will… refresh you as a parent. Humor will help you see your teen’s behavior as something that isn’t the end of the world.
Save your energy for important things by not stressing over the little things.
Try to have fun with your stepchild, think about scoring points with your stepchild in light-hearted ways every now and then. For example, watch a comedy or spend the day at an amusement park, etc.
Persist
Becoming a family doesn't happen overnight.
In fact, therapist Patricia Papernow warns that it may take a few years, but keep working at it, because the benefits from your relationship with your stepchild will be worth it.
Source: https://giadinh.suckhoedoisong.vn/13-nam-chung-song-hanh-phuc-vo-tro-mat-ngay-sau-khi-con-trai-rieng-tro-ve-song-chung-17225011315270075.htm
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