My Father's War Diary

 

During the days when the whole country is looking forward to the 50th anniversary of the liberation of the South and the reunification of the country, I write down these diary entries to remind myself to live better every day.

1. The diary begins in the fiercest years of the war against America to save the country. Despite hardships and pain and loss, like many other soldiers of Uncle Ho, he was always filled with revolutionary ideals, ready to devote and sacrifice for the independence and freedom of the Fatherland.

“In the spring of 1965, I enlisted in the army and became a soldier of the People’s Army. I had not been in the army for many days when my unit was bombed by American planes in the barracks. That time, I escaped death, and the unit evacuated to a civilian house. The unit was given two days off to replenish its equipment and then continued to carry backpacks, climbing mountains and wading through streams. The entire journey was sometimes early, sometimes late, sunny some days, rainy some days. There were times when I missed home so much that I didn’t want to talk or laugh, but we encouraged each other and continued on our journey” - excerpt from the diary entry dated June 7, 1971.

“In May 1965, I was assigned to a porter unit, called Team 62. The unit was newly established and therefore lacking in all aspects. As a porter unit, the soldiers in the unit were mostly brothers from Zone IV. In the second month, I was struck down by my first bout of jungle fever. My health gradually collapsed due to the torment of malaria. After two months of porterage, the unit was assigned another task. Carrying all kinds of goods to support the fight. Going from place to place, sometimes lacking salt and hungry, sometimes being fiercely attacked by the enemy. Going all the way to Bac River, Cha Re village, Mung Noong, Ta Vang, Dac Chung. Sometimes going all the way to Xe Su, Phi Ha village. Then crossing the Quang Nam road throughout the Lower Laos region, everywhere there were my footprints” - excerpt from diary entry dated May 24, 1965.

“My greatest pride and joy was joining the Communist Party of Vietnam on December 25, 1967. I think from now on I must try harder, strive harder to contribute more to the Fatherland and the People” - (excerpt from diary entry dated December 29, 1967).

There were diary entries written hastily on the march, even while wounded soldiers were sleeping. That was the time when my father went to nursing school and was assigned to take care of wounded soldiers. Reading those pages now, I can clearly imagine the fierceness of the battlefield, because the boundary between life and death is so fragile.

“It rained all day today. As usual, I took my pen and wrote a few lines in my diary. The work of the day was done, but there were still too many wounded and sick soldiers left. The service work was somewhat complicated, but the task of the day was completed, without any complaints. At this time, everyone was fast asleep. Only I was still awake” -(June 7, 1971).

2. In my father's diary entries on the battlefield, there was always a deep longing for his mother, his homeland, his loved ones... Everything was sent back in each line, each page. The letters that had not been sent yet. The most touching thing was when I read "Letter to Sister Hoai" , written to my aunt during the long years without receiving letters from home. Those years, I longed to hear the sound of children crying, and I longed for the smell of smoke from the kitchen of my hometown. On the vehicle carrying the wounded out, I also looked to see if there was a girl's face.

Miss you, Hoai!

Every dry season is a season of letters for soldiers. In the distant battlefield thousands of kilometers from home, although the letters may arrive after 3 months, 5 months, 7 months or even a year, they are still new letters, the truth of home, the voice of relatives and contain the most precious things. But you know, today some friends received 2 letters, some 3-4 and even more, some 6, 7 letters. It was really happy, unimaginably happy. As for me, I thought that after a year without letters, I would receive 1-2. I waited and waited and waited, but in the end, nothing came back, making me worried and confused. This afternoon, everyone was engrossed in the letters they had just received. They forgot about lunch. But I held the bowl of rice and could not swallow it. It was like something was blocking my throat. Tears were about to flow, do you understand? My heart longing for my mother and missing my grandchildren kept urging me. Day after day, month after month, never ending...

…Missing you, Hoai!

How is your health these days? Mom must be very old, the premature old age of those who work hard. When she left, her hair was already gray, the wrinkles on her forehead were getting more and more crowded, now her hair must be all gray, right? When I was still at home, I used to pluck out my mom's gray hair, but I couldn't pluck it all out. When we reunite, I don't know if I will be able to see my mom again! I'm very worried about her health. The hardships of the poor days will of course shorten a person's life. As for my grandchild, he must be very grown up. I just imagine the children here to compare him. But he is different from the children here. Here, he lived under the bombs of the American invaders from the time he was in his mother's womb, he lacked understanding of society. Some of them lacked even the love of their parents. They only had the love of the Party and the Revolution. Like me, I was born without the love of my father. But I still have the love of my homeland. As for my grandchild, he has everything. Perhaps he will be much older than the children here of his age. If I remember correctly, he will be 8 years old in August 1972. This year he is in grade 2. As a mother and a teacher, you must be responsible for his education and growth. Don’t let him waste anything regrettable. You must let him satisfy his own desires. Forget the bitter days of his father and uncle…

…I am preparing to go on a business trip, of course there will be many difficulties and hardships. But don't worry, sister and mother. Although I am far from my family, I always have the love of the Party, the cadres, comrades and people. Having experienced many hardships and challenges, I am confident that I will overcome them all" - (excerpt from "Letter to Sister Hoai" - April 15, 1972).

3. But on the battlefield, there is not only blood, bullets, bombs, hunger and endless malaria, there is death and sacrifice, but there is also beautiful, romantic love. Beside the bomb craters that still smell of bombs, love still blossoms. War, no matter how fierce, cannot destroy the vitality and the flame of love in each soldier, as my father wrote in his diary.

“My squad lived in a family, where every day after practice, we had boiled sweet potatoes to eat. There was a girl in the house named Tran Thi Kim Loi, one year younger than me, slim, plum-colored skin, shoulder-length hair, and gentle eyes. Although she was quiet, she was cheerful. Orphaned at a young age, Loi had the characteristic of writing beautifully with her left hand. In just seven days, Loi had developed feelings for me, wrote me letters several times, and even gave me a picture. However, at that time, military discipline was very strict, so I could not talk to Loi at all. Then one morning, the unit received an urgent march order. She shouldered her backpack and left quietly, saying goodbye to my beloved family without a word of farewell. Then she disappeared without a letter and never saw me again” - (excerpt from diary on May 27, 1966).

There is also the belief in victory, peace, and national unity. “Seven winters have passed. How quickly, the revolution has changed. The work I have done is countless. The war is still going on. But the country will definitely be at peace and then I will be reunited with my family” - (excerpt from diary entry dated December 4, 1972).

Thao Phuong

 

Source: https://baobariavungtau.com.vn/van-hoa-nghe-thuat/202504/nhat-ky-chien-truong-cua-cha-toi-1040118/