Smiling Eyes - Short story by La Thi Anh Huong

1. In the evening, the dry wind blew through the willow trees in front of the porch. When it was time for class, she sat in the lotus position. In this position, her legs would go from pain to numbness. According to the instructions from the basic meditation class, this was a good sign, because if you overcome this stage, you can sit all day without any pain or fatigue. But that was for the Zen masters, but she had not overcome it yet, so about 45 minutes later, just moving her feet would be very painful. That was the reason she chose to sit in this lotus position for online class, simply because of the pain, she had to sit still. Otherwise, she would fidget in her living space. It was as if her brain did not voluntarily anchor itself to anything, without being forced. So as soon as she took her eyes off the screen, she would immediately shift her focus to something else. So, when would she pass this basic "rich-making skills" class from Quan? She remembered that she had studied it for the fourth time! Studying is free because Quan is her best friend.

She remembered Quan once saying that she had to go further than she was yesterday. If she did well in her profession today, she would have to think about opening a class tomorrow. In fact, she noticed on social media that recently many of her friends had become masters. At her age, they had at least ten years of experience in their profession. That alone was enough to give her the confidence to teach.

ILLUSTRATION: VAN NGUYEN

On the computer screen, Quan appeared poised and confident in his lecture. "The brain always needs the arrangement of consciousness before turning those things into reality. So what arrangements have you made for yourself at the beginning of this year?" She wondered what she was thinking? Was the thing that troubled her most after the Tet holiday, embracing her plants and leaves, how to take care of them to make them flourish? Where would it be appropriate to put them? Is it okay to put the apricot pot next to the bonsai pot? So where should we put the kumquat pot from last year? Maybe move them to another location. That thought formed in her imagination, as if she were really starting to do it. After the kumquat pot had been in place for a year, bearing fruit and hanging on the branches, would it be out of place now if it was moved? She had heard that tree roots have a very intelligent natural reflex. Only when left in one place will they take root and grow.

In this knowledge, she has a real experience. The potted plants that she likes, she often brings to the tea table every morning to admire, even to chat, as if they were close friends. Only after the meeting is over does she bring them back to their original place. Little did she know, those tiny, speechless roots only react by shrinking back, not sprouting, blooming flowers or leaves, until she puts the plant in one place.

In the modest garden in the middle of the city, there was not enough space for her plants. In her garden, there were VIP positions, positions A, B, C that she had set up herself. Any plant that needed to be restored, she would reserve a VIP position, and so on. The thought of a large garden where she could freely grow plants was like a source of cool water that soothed her mind, even if it was just in her mind.

One time she visited her parents' grave, passing through a scorching field in the middle of spring, she remembered her longing for a garden in the suburbs, just to plant trees to fulfill her wish, was this the place? No. She stood in the middle of the deserted street on the third day. She saw her own shadow also wandering in the stray wind. She had an extremely rich imagination. Immediately, she drew a plot of land that would be the suburban house she had dreamed of, next to a clump of bamboo or bamboo that was sparsely yellow under the harsh sunlight. She would make a fence, the kind of white poles like the model houses she had seen online. Once finished, she saw how lost the house was in the middle of the wild field, in the distance there were also piles of garbage formed from human unconsciousness. And will that white fence remain pristine white when every afternoon, children kick the mud, play soccer, fly kites… Even the herd of calves occasionally get lost, will they “visit” her lovely paradise? She imagines that there is a big gap between her wishes and reality.

Her husband was more practical. He said: "It's not that you like a house in the countryside. You still need safety and cleanliness, specifically a house with a garden in the middle of the city. Like a villa! That means we have to be really rich, right?". She liked that about her husband, he wouldn't destroy her dreams, nor would he pressure her into being "really rich".

Quan said: "With the connections from your social media accounts, you can make money with anything. Whenever you want to sell something, just tell me and I will advise you." Quan also whispered a secret to her: "Now making money online is easy as pie. Do you believe that during the pandemic, I earned billions?". She remembered that since the pandemic, she could no longer leisurely go out for coffee and chat with Quan. He was busy with his startups at the age of U.50. Busy but cheerful and confident.

One day, Quan sent her a message with a link: "Go to the link, enter your information and our staff will contact you to join the class!" Oh, is this the Quan of her past? There's also "our staff". She almost didn't recognize the friend who, when she was single, would sit in a coffee shop every morning, chat about trivial things and laugh loudly with her on the street corner. Quan was different now. Everyone goes through a barrier to step up to a new level. In adulthood, that level is formed in the confidence of one's ego, without the need for any academic title or degree to recognize it.

She decided to join the get-rich-quick class where Quan was the speaker.

2. In the coffee shop, she didn't have to look at Quan vaguely through the internet connection. Quan didn't wear a black suit like when he was in class, but only wore a shirt with cufflinks. People say that successful people will have an aura. She tilted her head to see if Quan had changed in any way compared to before. He was still the same. His voice was warm and always friendly. He asked her: "How's your work these days?". She also politely replied: "I still do freelance work, but life has gotten better as time goes by!". Quan thought for a moment, then said bluntly: "I see you as my youngest sister, so I'll be frank, you have to be different." She didn't know what she "wasn't good at", but still listened attentively to Quan: "Those friends in D1, who studied in my class, are now starting their own businesses. Now that we have the theory, we have to take action, dear!".

Now she understood what Quan meant. She knew, Quan still wanted the best for her, wanted to push her forward. One time, Quan took her to a meeting of business owners. In a room at a luxury hotel located right in the center, where just stepping through the door, the smell of the upper class filled the air. What kind of smell it was, she didn't know specifically, but it was clearly the smell of a wealthy space. Everyone shook hands and greeted each other as if they were familiar with each other, then introduced themselves and their "products". It turned out, they were all bosses in a certain field. Her horizons were broadened, but after that meeting, when she returned, she lay lethargic all afternoon. She tried to remember, what did she do that morning to have to expend so much energy? She did nothing, just smiled, greeted, shook hands, listened, and smiled again. In fact, with that lightness, she should have absorbed so much energy, and it was positive energy from people who were eagerly moving forward on their journey. But what she received in return was all people who were as limp as noodles with too much water in the processing stage. Since when had human contact become so difficult for her?

Quan hadn't read the thoughts of endurance in her head, thinking she was surprised by a world full of bosses, so he leaned in and whispered in her ear: "They just need to laugh and talk and one day they can earn hundreds of millions in revenue, honey! I think that's what makes life worth living." She looked at the energetic handshakes and sparkling joys, wondering what was real and what was fake? She even wondered in her head, was earning a lot of money the way to bring happiness? So how many people are struggling to make a living outside that door, are they all just unhappy? Or specifically like her, since the pandemic, she has suffered the same fate as many people who have fallen into unemployment. Is she really that unhappy?

Not really. At first, she thought about fixed monthly expenses, then she found ways to manage. She gradually avoided the "loud" conversations of her friends, when talking about income, about job opportunities, about wasteful expenses... She had to conserve her energy to always believe that she would overcome the most difficult period. She gave up her hobby of arranging fresh flowers every day like before, she talked to her husband and children about reasonable spending. She felt lucky to have good health and a happy family.

She got through the days of "no fresh flowers" in the house, by planting a small garden for herself. She watered and cultivated the flower buds herself, perhaps because she was so enthusiastic that they accepted her broken knowledge of plants to grow, flower, and bear fruit. Her joy was so simple, when just opening her eyes to see the young buds reaching for the sun, she was filled with joy and love for life. The happiest thing was that her children were also excited to take care of the plants with their mother. Little Ut even told her father: "In the future, I will be a biologist." That was after she finished reading the book Lessons from the Forest that she had on her bedside table.

That night, Quan texted her: "Did you get anything out of this morning?" She frankly said: "I don't fit in that space, maybe because I feel too small!" Quan complained: "I'm feeling self-conscious again."

She believed, like in a book she read, there would be a space suitable for her. Only then would she feel the energy flowing.

3. Quan's opening sentence in each class is also a question: "Do you feel rich?". Then Quan shared many times that, every morning when he wakes up, he spends time focusing on wealth, imagining himself being rich. With that installed dream, along with practical actions, he has made his life richer than before. This is true. Quan came to this city from a penniless person, now he has bought a house, a luxury four-wheeled vehicle, and a wife and children. She had witnessed Quan's difficult time, when he had to constantly change boarding houses to suit his increasingly limited income, especially when his children were born one after another. Then somehow, Quan saw the potential of subcontracting boarding houses and high-end houses in this city, and his income just kept increasing exponentially. Quan's life-changing story inspired many students in the class. But after studying for the fourth time, she still couldn't imagine herself being rich, or about to be rich, even in her imagination like Quan said.

In the morning, she usually wakes up very early. She takes advantage of going to the market to buy fresh food to prepare breakfast for the whole family, both saving money and having a safe meal. The city suddenly turns cold this season, there are mornings when she lies curled up in the blanket, updating the temperature on her smartphone, it is only 19 degrees Celsius. Her husband also wakes up after her movement, he says: "You don't need to cook anything, today the whole family will go out to eat breakfast". At that time, the thought of needing to earn money arises in her. She cannot let her husband shoulder the family's expenses for too long.

That thought sometimes followed her into Quan's class.

4. A beautiful sunny day. Quynh - her best friend texted: "There's a job here that's hiring, I think My is a good fit, because they need someone mature, calm, gentle, and trustworthy." Quynh's words were like a cool stream of water, watering the seeds of confidence in every cell of her body.

She came to the interview on a beautiful sunny day.

"To be honest, I'm tired of dealing with people, but I still have the burden of the country so I can't retire yet. Please come back and work with me until I retire, in about 7 or 8 years!". She started her new job after the interview, which was simpler than she imagined.

Quan knew she was on probation at a new place, but he still couldn't stop thinking about helping her, with the suggestion: "If you need anything, just text me!". If it were in the past, she would ask Quan a lot of things related to psychology, skills... because that was in the field Quan was teaching. But right now, she felt it was no longer necessary. She sent Quan a photo of the kumquat tree she planted, which was full of fruit. Each cluster was heavy, gradually turning a golden yellow color. Yesterday, her youngest child saw on the internet that the kumquat tree full of fruit was a symbol of abundance and wealth. Younger child even exclaimed: "So our family is going to be rich soon, Mom!". She smiled brightly, realizing that even the confidence she had didn't need to be forced. Because right at this moment, deep in her heart, she felt rich and fulfilled.

The photo of the kumquat pot she sent to Quan, along with the message was a very familiar saying of Quan in class: "Today, I feel so rich!".

Quan also responded with a smiley face. A breeze passed by, the kumquats swayed gently, somehow she saw the kumquats as smiling, bustling eyes.

Source: https://thanhnien.vn/mat-cuoi-xon-xao-truyen-ngan-cua-la-thi-anh-huong-185250301151128407.htm